per aspera ad astra

This isn’t even about my views. I’m sure that it’s been established via forums that I am an immensely open-minded person when it comes to these things, and that I believe everyone is entitled to love who they please, etc.

Rather, this is going to discuss someone near my age who has similar views…although is a bit more passionate/angry about going about it. I understand being passionate about your beliefs, and I think that it is important, very important, to stand up for your beliefs and what you think is right. I do not think, however, it is in good taste to claim to hate everyone or have other hostile feelings towards an entire group because of the actions or words of some that belong to that group.
Perhaps it’s because she’s young.

For some background…This is the young lady who I mentioned before in my previous post, In Comparison. She isn’t a bad person, and generally means well, but often speaks and acts before she thinks. Now, we’re all guilty of this. I’m guilty of this far more often than I’m comfortable with, admittedly.
She was raised as a Catholic, typical indoctrination stuff, and was Confirmed as a Catholic at age thirteen…around which time, and for a year prior [or so], she and I had been having pretty heated arguments regarding the tenets and doctrines of Christianity. This was all brought on by, at the time, her preaching at me over my status as a heathen. I do not attack people for having different beliefs than I do, but if I’m attacked and scorned over it, I do have a tendency to lash out somewhat cruelly. Long story short, my well-read [apparently, although she was at the time a vehement mini-Catholic, she never bothered to read the scripture...whereas I have] and backed side of the debates led her to question what she’d been raised into. She tried to postpone her Confirmation because of her doubts, but her mother forced her into it. So now she’s a self-described Athiest and abhors the Church. Go figure.

She made another post on MySpace this evening, and it reads thusly:

[Are YOU Homophobic?] Then please go jump off a cliff and die a horribly painful death. Want to know the reason for this?

So I was just looking through one of my friend’s Facebooks (no, I will not say who though they will probably figure out it’s them) and I was just looking at all of their bumper stickers. They’re cute and whatnot and entertaining to say the least. Well, inbetween two larger pictures I noticed a very small one. I didn’t pay any attention to it at first and then I decided to just see what it was about.

Well, what did this picture say? “God created Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve”. Well this just fucking pissed me off.

When I had my camp friends over, Walker and I stayed up really late just watching Youtube videos and looking through my files and whatnot. I had him watch the powerpoint on Gay Rights I made for my end of the year project in World History II in sophomore year. The pictures of Shirley Phelps-Roper had him crushing my hand in frustration and he was beyond words. You see, Walker’s bi-sexual and is somewhat affected by all of this. So the second I saw this, I remembered how angry he had gotten and how that in turn affected me.

Some of our other conversations had to do with Christians and their disdain for gays and the like (you see, we’re both atheists). I’d say about 99% of all homophobics are Christians or have some sort of religious affiliation.

So the moral of this story? I fucking hate all Christians and homophobics.

No, I don’t care if you’re Christian and my friend. Right now, I’m not on good terms with you either. I don’t understand how one can believe in something that has never even looked you in the face or shown his/her precense. It’s unbelievable how gullible people can be! I’m sick and tired of religion existing in the world and fucking up the system! I need all of you to go and commit mass genocide/suicide. It will solve most of the world’s problems, I assure you.

And no, I don’t care if I have offended you in this message. I don’t want to see your anti-gay paraphernalia anywhere in the public, nor do I want to hear it spoken from your mouth. If you think it’s better we not be friends, fine.

But I’ll leave you with this closing statement for you to think upon:
Gays are humans, too. Why can’t they have the same rights we gave African Americans and women?

Well first of all, that last bit is kinda shortsighted and only applies to America. A true activist would demand things the world over. ;] Anyway, we had already been engaged in a conversation over video conversion software, so I decided to change to subject in hopes of persuading her to adopt a less corrosive bit. Sadly, I failed. What do you make of this?

Me: Okay.. I understand that you’re passionate about what you’re doing. But someone is entitled to their beliefs just as much as you are.
Me: And perhaps they aren’t actually homophobic,maybe they just thought it was a funny wording. Furthermore, boo, not all Christians are gay-hating jerks. It isn’t fair to lump everyone in one category.
Kate: 1. I know this chick personally, and I know it’s what she believes… 2. I’m not counting her among the homophobics.
Me: But to say, as you did that you hate all Christians because of something that some of them believe is just as narrow-minded as the ones that are, to us, in err.
Me: For example…last time I checked–and it may be different because she flipflops sometimes–, Kelsey still describes herself as Christian. And she’s OBVIOUSLY not under that group.
Me: Just because the beliefs and preaching of a certain area or aspect of the group is wrong in your or my eyes doesn’t mean that we should scorn the whole group. That doesn’t make us any better, now.
Me: And I’m not being bitchy, and I’m not trying to cause drama. I’m just saying…y’know, be passionate, but not hateful. Hate directed towards groups is inefficient. Hatred is better left to individuals.
Kate: If you knew who I was really aiming this at, you wouldn’t be talking. This isn’t everyone in the world.
Kate: This is mainly targeted to hit my friends. The ones I know who are like this.
Me: Okay, but to say things like, “I fucking hate rah rah rah…” Isn’t that a bit extreme? And that’s just baiting them to try to cause issues.
Kate: I believe I can say whatever I want, though.
Me: I’m not saying you don’t. I’m just saying that perhaps you might rethink your avenues of doing so, and instead of expressing it with angst and rage, you might benefit more from a more creative, constructive approach.
Kate: … I’ve tried that, Jenn. Many time. Hence why now I’m at the end of my limit.
Me: Then being all rawr likely isn’t going to do much but frustrate you more than you are, and hurt friendships that otherwise wouldn’t be affected by the issue. You have to accept some disagreements, it’s part of what you’ve been waiting for so long, you know, growing up?
Me: You know how I feel about the situation. Everyone is entitled, as far as I’m concerned, to love who they want, and for anyone to try to say otherwise is wrong, in my eyes. Everyone should be able to marry who they please, and AoCs should be lowered as far as I’m concerned, the works.
Kate: So far, all of my friendships have been affected by the fact that all of them believe in God and I don’t.
Me: Why is it REALLY that big of a deal? I don’t have problems with my who friends do. I didn’t have a problem with you when you did, aside from your preaching, which we evidently rectified.
Kate: When I show my friend this powerpoint and he’s on the verge of crying because of it, it really hurts to look at shit that’s anti-gay. When he squeezed the shit out of my hand and probably was close to breaking my fingers he was so enraged, it’s a big deal in my eyes. To have a friend who can’t come out to her parents that she’s lesbian for fear of punishment, it’s a big deal.
Me: No, I’m asking why is their faith a big deal. It shouldn’t cause that much of an issue, between friends. And that’s really tragic that she feels as if she can’t do that, and her parents definitely suck for not appearing to be accepting of the situation. But you can’t just make your demands and have them met, Kate. Saying you hate people won’t make his tears dry or her parents be more open-minded and accepting of their child’s sexuality and person.
Me: By handling it the way you want to handle it right now will only have you viewed as a foaming-at-the-mouth fanatic. People are afraid of fanaticism. You need to approach things calmly and with a collected demeanor…no one wants to listen to someone who seems rabid.
Kate: I don’t care. I really don’t.
Me: Then you don’t care enough to do it right and you aren’t going to get anywhere and you’ll be floundering in futility, defeating your self-defined purpose. Sounds to me like a waste of time, hm?
Kate: Jenn, stop with the self-righteous, condescending shit. You know I don’t care and by trying to lead me down the right path to approach this, you’re just making me more pissed. You have awful timing.
Me: I’m not being condescending.
Kate: You are. It sure sounds like it.
Me: You’re notorious for your misperception of tones in online conversation.
Me: But what I’m saying is more like, y’know, an eye for an eye, blah blah, world’s blind, etc.
Me: [Unless there was like a pirate or something. Because then, y'know, uneven number of eyes, and then the world wouldn't really be blind...just depth-perception and peripheral-vision-challenged.]
Kate: Hah. Nice.
Me: But on a serious note, I’m not being condescending, and I’m not trying to act holier-than-thou [ironic, hah]. Just saying that you might reap better results if you did it differently, is all.
Me: Like for example, if a hardcore rabid vegetarian approaches me saying I’m a bad person, etc, I’m not going to want to listen to what they have to say, because they’re being hostile and rude. However, if someone approaches me with a slightly more amicable demeanor, I’d be more inclined to share words, or at least hear them.
Me: Understand?

But I guess she didn’t, because I didn’t get a response.
How disappointing.

It felt as if she thought that I was trying to scorn her opinion, and I’m not. She knows full well how I feel [but also seems to forget that it affects her other friends such as Kelsey and I just as much as it affects her friend Walker...we just seem to have a bit more backbone than the boy, hrm], but fighting fire with fire doesn’t always work.
Damn kids. So young, so angry…