Mog and Chips

-Because they’ll NEVER ban smoking there!” She says, blowing another cloud of smoke in the left side of my face.

I know it’s just kidding around, but I kinda realised then that the next person that whines “It’s stopping my freedom to smoke indoors!” I’m going to whack them on the backside of the head and tell them “You’re refusal to go outside for all of 5 minutes for your fag contradicts directly to MY freedom to go home and NOT have to scrub my coat, NOT have to either shower before bed at 12am and wake everyone up or go to bed with my hair and skin smelling of stale smoke and then my pillows and sheets smelling of stale smoke. It also contradictd my freedom to wear my jeans more than one day a week because they smell so much of 600 different brands of cigarette I can’t stand to even sit in the house with them, nevermind get on a bus at6 in the afternoon reeking the passenger area out with smoke when I don’t even smoke myself, then go to a pub, which may well ruin another pair of jeans - of which I don’t have enough of to wear 5 different pairs a week.

If you can’t spare 5 goddamn minutes to go outside and save me all that when you are the one that decides to smoke and I have no control over whatever you choose to do yet I get the consequences, then sod you, quite frankly.”

The ban’s coming in anyway - I don’t know why at train stations as well because if it’s outside it’s not like the smoke’s hanging around that much, and it’s only in indoor public places and “substancially enclosed” spaces like football grounds. There’s nothing anyone can do about it, and I’m bloody sick of hearing people complain that it’s so terribly cold outside oh woe is me etc.

There’s the passive smoking thing, which everyone’s arguing over because the evidence is or isn’t substancial etc etc, but it’s still bloody unpleasant for anyone that doesn’t smoke to be trapped inside with the smoke from god knows how many brands of cigarette to have to take all that home with them, as opposed to standing outside for 5 minutes, and probably with a mate or two anyway, because I’ve got nothing against smoking, when it’s outside and not getting blown in my face, hair and clothes.

But pubs are for smoking, right? I’d better avoid all social gatherings that happen to occur at a pub in case I insult a smoker’s freedom, completely ignoring my own. That’s what annoys me about most (not all) people that argue against the smoking ban : it’s always a “me” thing, or a “well if you don’t want passive smoke don’t go to a pub then!” exactly how many places serving alcohol that prohibit smoking and don’t charge an entrance fee are there around? I don’t mind garden pubs because the smoke goes away, but 1- there’s not that many in brighton or where I’m staying for uni and 2- how hypocritical is it to say “well I don’t want to go outside in the cold to smoke my fag, but YOU have to sit outside in the cold the entire night to avoid OUR smoke”

I just woke up grouchy today. I went to bed pissed off and with stomach cramps, and I woke up pissed of and with stomach cramps, and still smelling like smoke from the night before because some very considerate people lit up right next to me while I was eating and continued blowing malboro smoke at me all night. Not away from me, not past me, not above me and just happened to catch me because of the wind (not that there’s any inside anyway), but bloody at me.

And stomach cramps. If I have to put up with spewing blood every other week if not more frequently, instead of once a month in the promise that I won’t have cramps, then goddamnit I do not expect to have cramps.

I’ve also just spent half this week’s budget on easter eggs, and probably the rest of my budget on some silly picnic going on tomorrow where I may well be the only person bringing a substancial amount of food and 20 people I don’t actually know will bugger off with it. I love my mate to bits but for fucks sake I’m sick of her being the only person I know at these gatherings of about 15 people! I want to bring food to share, I actually like sharing but I only like sharing with people I actually know! I was going to make a cake and stuff thinking it would only be a few of us but I’m so bloody worn out of going to pub and then going to another pub and then going to another pub with all of her mates but barely any of mine! Why don’t I organise something myself? Because she’s taken up every day of the week with it! I’m not sociable enough to spend every day with the same 15 people crowded around a pub table! I’ve only been able to grab 2 days to arrange anything, I’ve done all of 10 frames of the 500-odd I need to do because her coping mechanism is to be so busy that she doesn’t have time to think of anything.

Good. Great for her. I’d love to help any way I can, but this is bloody tiring me out, especially because I don’t know these people in the first place, I try to get on with them, it’s not like I refuse to talk to them, in fact I’ve got the jist of their personalities quite well, but eventually it comes down to not actually having enough in common to find two weeks of conversation out of the blue having only just met them. Vary the people each time and yeah, maybe!

Monday day and night: preparing for this sodding picnic when I don’t even know who else is there. Also cleaning house.

Tuesday: The sodding picnic itself and finding things very awkward because I’ve brought stuff to share, but not enough because I don’t know how many people are there and I’ll only have… £11, and I have to buy picnic stuff and dipping stuff for wednesday too.

Wednesday day: Preparing for chocolate fountain and cleaning entire house that’s got dirty over the past 2 days again, and having only 3 of 5 people invited probably show up.

Wednesday night: Chocolate fountain night, having said friend disappear halfway through fountain night to go to someone’s party or likewise double booked event the way she did last time. Cleaning up chocolate fountain night remains.

Thursday morning: Watching boyfriend go home after not getting to spend any time with him alone whatsoever. Packing my stuff.

Friday: getting home and unpacking. Hopefully not getting caught by the housemate of endless natter because I will have 500 frames and an essay plan to do over the two and a half days remaining! Hurrah!

No, chocolate isn’t helping. It’s not a moodswing because the sides of my head aren’t buzzing with noise like it always does when it’s a moodswing; I think it’s just the stress of not actually having enough time for myself which, though I’m usually generally tolerant of other things, really, really gets to me.

And yeah, I know smoking’s addictive and people don’t neccessarily choose to smoke. But when you’ve got perks like getting out of work 5 minutes every hour, eventually mounting to 40 minutes in a full time day in addition to lunch break, and I’m wasn’t allowed 5 minutes for a fucking drink when I was at work because I’m not a smoker, it’s not really helpful to people that are trying to quit to lose all the ‘perks’ with it. And I’ve nothing against smoking in general, until I’m trapped inside and have to take the stale smoke smell home with me, or until someone blows smoke in my face out of thoughtlessness, not by accident.

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