Shin

Diary Of Dreams – Psychoma?

Psychoma?

01. (ver)GIFT(et)
02. never-FREEZE
03. Methusalem
04. Luna(-tic)
05. Drop Dead
06. Touch
07. E.-dead-Motion
08. Never!Land
09. Wild
10. You(-das)
11. Tranceformation Baby
12. End(giftet)?

(ver)GIFT(et)

(The new Messiah)

Das Gift des Messias
Rainbow’s End
The new Messiah
Das Gift wartet auf uns am anderen Ende des

Regenbogen

Thankful as I stumble into future
I fall asleep in this god-given Gift
Kind of weird your absolution
Father, make them go!

Your hand touches my face
As if it glides through water
A kiss on lifeless flesh

You should have practiced what you preach!

First you asked for darkness
And now you want the sun
It’s been so long since someone cared

A hostage just to have a friend
How thoughtful and how kind
Drown my head in water
Slice me into halves

You really think I’d care?

Legenden werden geboren und in kleinen
gepolsterten Zimmern aufbewahrt.
Einsam lernst Du das zu lieben was Du nie
beruhren wirst

It is rather indefinable whether a dream can response to reality, or if it is possibly more likely that the knowledge of the existence of our subconscious being, which sincerely rejects what is not in our definate(range of) acceptance, can survive much longer…

However our decision may turn out, the magic of its inspirative influence issurely the best proof to what research has made me accept:

Metablic, schizoid indeed, s-care-ful-d we may tremble towards our future, but still always being aware of nothing else more anxiously, but of our dreams.

^back to top

never-FREEZE

(Flower in ice)

Eternal ice as far as eyes can see
Deserted wind, an inspiration need

This white horizon, so sure a lonely guard
Oath to preserve, admire graceful art

Flower in ice, this artificial life
The beauty lies to your devoted feet

Down on my knees, they feel so numb,
are blue
I talk to her, I dedicate my words

Of course not, how could I dare to thaw
Of course not, why should I care for life
…at all

Immortal beauty, unbearable in splendour
A season change as days fly by

I see her thaw, give life to beauty
To rouse me out of transformation

Ice now bursts in thousand pieces
Imprisoned I now under her

I listen to this lifeless rushing
And hear her speak to me now, softly

Of course not, how could I dare to thaw
Of course not, why should I care for life
…at all

^back to top

Methusalem

(Anti Methusalem Syndrome)

I plastered all these walls with color
I drank your tears watered with wine
Contented with this taste of anger
Regarding this was mine

I tested all in vague proportions
I drank your tears like they were mine
I dared to speak of new horizons
and blinded both your eyes with mine

Can you feel it coming?
Can you feel it go?
Anti Methusalem Syndrome

Misled by an angel
I thought I saw the sun bleed
Up my throat they crawl
To turn in little rumours

Infinite temptation
Fateful, formless, rare
Distant condulation
I know whose words they are

How dare you speak, or even move
Dimorphicly disabled gestures
Prophylactic tendencies
as bodies need their prostitution

My tongue was bent in all directions
Circling motion in slight confusion
E-dead spies return in failure
prayer after prayer (just) in case it helps

It’s in our kind
It’s on my mind
It’s pure and holy
It’s what I’ve done…,done to you

Can you see him running?
Can you see his home?
Anti Methusalem Syndrome

^back to top

Luna(-tic)

(An ode to grace)

Fragile!

Tranquility has lost its silence
Disguised in wildest rage
A thoughtful friend, the chosen sinner

My stability too vague

For what now have I suffered?
For what now have I died?
The wildest creatures touch my body
I feel my breath disperse

Fragile!

I tried to see my liberty

I tried to find my conscious mind
I tried to see humanity
I tried to fly away from my mortality
…undone!

Enflame my paradise with wisdom
Strangely rare
Intoxication
A legend dies to stay alive

A priest will hold your hand
Trust in god and pray for the devil
An angel heals the deepest wounds
Or at least I think so?

Was it ever in my range of chance
In my strongest urge I know at least it was

^back to top

Drop Dead

Drop dead-permanently gorgeous
In the mood to lose control

Go leave me as my best friend, (but please)
stay out of sight
I hunger for the next one-tonight

Are you cleaned in your soul?

Or is a victim the one who speaks the truth?

What can you tell about a person with a gun?
Come on, give up, give up!

My little servant is just like a tattoo
You cannot wash it off – you cannot seem to let it go

Maybe it may be, that you need shelter
Run for help, run for miles and find no one to blame!

I cannot see you
I cannot feel you
I cannot sense the distance to you (at all)

^back to top

Touch

(…the rainbow’s end)

Ein Gefuhl,
das wir uns, so denke ich, alle ersehnen,
ist das Gefuhl der Vollkommenheit,
der Eleganz in geschmeidiger Bewegung.
Wenn es etwas gottlich perfektes gibt oder
geben kann, dann das-
mit einem Ursprung der so unbegreifbar fern
und undurchsichtig ist, dass ich uber jeden
Fetzen der mir erhalten bleibt dankbar bin.

Der Zustand als solches umfasst uber
ausreichend Perfektion und bedarf keiner
externen Kraft: Pure Energie!

^back to top

E.-dead-Motion

Long, lost faces jump off fences
Taste the fall on bloody lips

Sit up, bend down
Connect the masses
Grounded, reduced to soil

Feel, fake – reject my touch
Shiver, shake – don’t trust my language

But still it’s up to you!

How can you cope with rare conditions

That you’ve caused by yourself

Never try to understand me!
Never try to face my faces!

^back to top

Never!Land

Wildest creatures sliver dreams
Which phantasy gave birth to once

A fairy-tale to make me shiver
A unicorn at rainbow’s end

To wear the willow for mankind
Embodied in these eyes of glass

This diagnosis kills the cause
Swallow now antitoxin

O’ can’t you see my little Never!Land?

My little rage, you took my Never!Land!

Play black and white keys
And write a book to understand…

Search for a flower in ice
Do not tranceform into a slave of lies

Accumulation of mankind
How stupid must we be to…Disagree to this!

And now you know I’m doubting
Everything you offer me in this demented world

^back to top

Wild

(2nd Tribe)

I welcome you with open arms

As a receit for feelings
Floating sand through desert lands
Like a million stitches in my skin

No use to hide, no use to run
I sacrifice my body
I fear the snake’s teeth, like a stranger’s torch
Enjoy what’s – raging – left of me

In my desert

Long lasting life for me
And my last breath
Messiah took from me

This is the last one of a sacrilegious dance
Embodied here, in the melody of wind
Understand to believe and feel to realize
Who are you to say the desert’s not alive

Can you feel the satin sea

So deeply blue, inside of me

Collected moments – fractured fruits of blindness
Militant, you offer me your hand
As I see your body sink in sand
And I smile to reject with noble kindness

Welcome you! with open arms
Enormous fire – it’s just the state I’m in
A million stitches – I’m one with these injections

Enjoy what’s – raging – left of me

^back to top

You(-das)

You(-das), You(-das)
Maybe you were not expected
And maybe I just wasn’t either
Regarding you I speak in riddles

Only I can understand
Ease it all for I feel better
Still there’s pity in this smile

Ease it all for I feel better
Better in my skin

You(-das), You(-das)
Justified in little whispers
And never waste a tear for this

Let me know when to feel guilty
Even though I should myself
Enter in this world of silence
Feeling comfortably embraced

You(-das), You(-das)
Embodied here – in no direction
Restless I reach out in time
Intimacy loosing face

Nowhere else you feel as mine

Knowledge never saves from mistakes!

^back to top

Tranceformation Baby

Mephisto’s brother
Now returns to wimmer with the wind
Out of life and out of color

Circular world of ancient dust ->
New born in (n)o. state
Und wie hat die Seuche zahlen gelernt…?

This is tranceformation!

gamma, memoryless child in no man’s land
Searching for remains of its soul

I could not reject this!

I could never slaughter! ->11
Und wie hat die Seuche sprechen gelernt…?

This is tranceformation!

What a thrill in X-ray hell
rated X-low
To the deepest, to the finest point be-low

Fortune-tellers know:

Crowned with thorns ->
Try this God given Gift – 8 flat
Und nie hat die Seuche leben gelernt!

Why don’t you come…?
Why don’t you come on home to me…?

Now this is tranceformation!

^back to top

End(giftet)?

(Vivid valediction)

Das Leben verbirgt sich hinter seinen
abertausenden Gesichtern, im Schatten dessen
was es selbst zu bewirken vermag.

Unbandbare Kraft verborgen in unheilbarer Sucht
nach mehr Gefuhl,nach viel mehr Gefuhl…

In blendendem Licht zu einer anonymen Masse
verschmolzen, deren Asthetik einzig und allein in
ihrem imaginar allem uberlegenen Intellekt liegt.

Utopie oder Fanatismus, wer weiss das schon…
(Und so schlendern wir orientierungslos, Angesicht
zu Angesicht, aneinander vorbei.)

Ich bin endgiftet, total endgiftet

Und dennoch schopfen wir immer wieder neues
Vertrauen und rufen es hinaus in die Leere, war-
tend auf ein sanftes Echo, das sich anschmiegsam
wie eine zweite Hulle um Dich wickelt,
Dir Trost spendet und Dir fur eine Weile Deine
muden Augen einfuhlsam zu schliessen versteht.

Vorbehaltlos verringerst Du Deine Erwartungen
auf ein Minimum:

Eine Hand gefroren im Eis, die andere im
odernden Feuer, so erstarrst Du…

Vergib mir, mein Freund, Du scheinst nicht zu
verstehen, aber wer weiss das schon?

Legenden werden geboren und in kleinen
gepolsterten Zimmern aufbewahrt.
Einsam lernst Du das zu lieben was Du nie
beruhren wirst

^back to top

Diary Of Dreams – One of 18 Angels

One of 18 Angels

01. Rumous About Angels
02. Butterfly:dance!
03. Mankind
04. Winter Souls
05. No-body Left To Blame
06. Chemicals
07. Babylon
08. Colorblind
09. People Watcher
10. Darker
11. Dead Souls Dreaming

Rumous About Angels

I will plaster all you mortals with my dominating guts
I will torment revelations – I did never ask for much
I will taste the detonation while the geminis go wild
I’ll absorb the human sigh, eradicate your dormant lie

Does it suck your breasts for milk, golden honey, dressed in silk

Does it feel your patient care in your dreadful glassy stare
or does it feel your true emotions in its scars and bruises burn
Do you really think your lies will tear open cloudy skies?

Feel my fingers in your wound while my eyes ascend the gloom
Questions wasting all my time – I see your eyes detesting mine
Sick of a life you never had, e.dead.motion, you look so sad
I could care less if I’d like – I let you go into the night

Is my ignorance my fate, or is my love distorted hate

Is deliverance my mate or am I sleeping while awake
Is this place that we call home adorned by devastating foam
Am I mortal, am I god – Am I brighter than you thought?

I will never beg for mercy – I will never kiss your feet
I will never ask forgiveness and all of that I want to keep!
I will guide the blind in darkness though I cannot see myself
I will whisper in a deaf ear while I know you cannot speak

and I hear rumours about angels

^back to top

Butterfly:dance!

Is this your true world definition?
you cannot help, where help is not wanted!
You cannot escape from your reality
Give me more of your salvation

Hello? …are you listening to me?

Hello? …why don’t you speak a word to me?

I tried to see you in my future
I tried to find you in my past

Let me feel your recognition
I can taste the way you look
I guess it was the right decision!
My thoughts are my bible, that’s by what I live

You live your life between these worlds
Color twists around your body
You and I got lost in rainbows
Our dreams were never made to last

^back to top

Mankind

Survive!

Mankind is suffering a severe instability
My friend you know, I swear, this was never written
We are not alone, but we are left by ourselves
We thirst for water, we hunger for a bite to eat

What is this faith for?
…if there is nothing to believe in?
What is this world for?
…if there is nothing to adore?

I can feel the warmth of the dying sun upon my face
I can see the bloody circle diving into the horizon
Deeply in love with the gloom disappearing
to leave me on my own
What is it that I can do to make this moment last forever?

For mankind! – This is mankind!
Mankind! – This is mankind!

What is this world without you in it,
without you giving it its colors?
What is that feeling
that conquers me once you are gone,
I feel forgotten!
How can I be so naive,
so ignorant to think you really care!
Watching the world around me change its ugly faces,
yes this is mankind!

^back to top

Winter Souls

I would not dare to blame you
I wouldn’t dare too much
I only ask for pity
So these faces feel your touch…

…upon their skin

My eyes see many faces
Many faces made of stone
I figure they are angels
All neglected by your throne

Deserted as lifeform
Between heaven, between hell
Unknown to one another
They know your eyes betray their spell

Down from heaven where you hide
You have demented all your pride
O’ give these faces holy glance
back their monumental trance

Your anger and your rage still silent
as I provoke that weakness too
So byouti-full, out of control
Your temper now is overwhelming

Is this the place you’re born for?
Is this the last frontier?
Is this the world we fight for?
Is this our sense of creed?

Winter souls regain their powers
to multiply the pain in you
Winter souls greed to bear silence
to take away all life from you!

And as I lay your head to sleep
silences echoes in your greed

^back to top

No-body Left To Blame

Until you put your spell on me
I did not know – who you are!
A little incantation now

You hypnotize the crowd

According to you
no-body else does matter now
According to you
nothing else does matter now

Your wings can spread around the world
Take all our sun away
Absorb the human pleasure dome

A lifetime in despair

I wonder how you lie to me
without the use of words?
I wonder why you came to me
without a look into my eyes?

^back to top

Chemicals

Lost in words of anticipation
Lost in words of revelations
23 and 5 resulting
Equally absorbed their sigh

And I need my chemicals
I need your chemicals

Are my dreams gone?

Are my words forgiven?
Are my deeds undone?
Am I now forgiven?

The walls of this chamber
were made to set you free
So soft, so clean
My friend, where have you been

I’m a revolutionary

A christian fairy tale
I’m a missionary
A visionary anarchist

I’m a full moon fever
I’m a non-believer
I have hope and I regret
I accept and I neglect

^back to top

Babylon

It´s kind of strange how
You put the blame away from you.
I understand now
we were in danger of ourselves!
What is our flesh for,
if not to feel our mortal shell!
What is our soul for,

if not to know we never die!

I try to face now
what I did never understand
What are these words you speak
why are they all unknown to me?

Welcome to babylon
The traitors’ homes of nower days
Come feel my terror

or watch the anger rise in me

You´d like to faint now,
to fall asleep into my arms
Where is your fate now
The one you spoke of in my arms

What was this war for,
if it is you who wins at last?
What is your word for,

if it is us who breaks the laws?

Detest my vices!
Watch the signs I´ve given you!
I speak of silence
and fear the sound of human kind!

^back to top

Colorblind

Would you care for color if you were blind?
Would you listen to my words if you could only see my lips move?
You search these faces for a smile, but you can’t see them with your eyes

Come to me,
Feel with me,
See with me,
This world has changed…….

The world has now forgotten you, for you have done that first!
Would you rather listen to the wind?
Would you rather search the stars for signs?
For it is us you live with, and we have never ever closed our eyes!

What do I need your comfort for?
if there is no place to live…
Your angel cheeks are stained with blood,
your hand evoking fear in me…

^back to top

People Watcher

Just like a hundred thousand snakes
You crawl around my legs
Without pride, a beggar for respect
How could you lose your self respect?

We see the signs and yes we learn from them

And still we never understand
Our hopes should not be buried yet alive,
but gain more strength with every smile

We see the stars´ eternal distance
As we reach out to take them home
Confused you speak of silence
As a scream ends in disguise

Your search for your excuses

One of hundreds of your tries
The past will gain your wisdom
The future through your lies

Lay down now all your weapons
To see the peace within your hands
We all move move further towards nowhere
To understand where we belong

Confused I speak of silence

As you start screaming to be heard
You gave up responsibility
There is a reason to your life

^back to top

Darker

I’m bursting all your bubbles
I’m cold while you deceive

I don’t care ’bout your troubles
I pray to get some sleep

Define the state of matter
Declare your eyes the war
You should have known it better
but still you wanted more

Mystical, not physical
Is there faith enough for all these souls

Hysterical, not logical
Is there room enough for all their shells?

Pale forces in fake environment
and biblical speeches so full of regret

Strange voices so full of agony
It sounds like it reaches deep into my head

Suffocate, deliberate

It is within, it is without
Gestures, eyes and invocations
It hides somewhere,
waiting – for he is yet to come…

I begged for answers all my life!
Is it true crime to say the truth?

This world is darker…
This life is darker…

…darker than before.

^back to top

Dead Souls Dreaming

And with these words you ask for justice?
And do your deeds make you feel better?
The sound of voices echoes deep into the touch
of my fingers, fragile, asking questions

You seemed like yourself…
until you slaughtered,
until you raped these feelings,
until you couldn’t tell apart,
what true and what false is in your life,
what dream or what reality is in your sleep.

And then you see them rising
Born into your sleep

Rising towards your horizon
Feel these
Dead souls dreaming
in your sleep

Last night I heard you speaking,
whisper in your sleep
You were talking about strangers,
longing for your dreams

^back to top

Diary Of Dreams – Freak Perfume

Freak perfume

01. Traum:A
02. The curse
03. O’Brother sleep
04. Chrysalis
05. Traumtänzer
06. Rebellion
07. Bastard
08. Amok
09. She
10. Verdict
11. Play God!
12. She and her darkness

Traum:A

Confront me one last time
to tell me all your lies
I wish I had the power
to make this anger go…

Lost something on the way

Something precious, thought I’d stray…

Beneath my kingdom, so they say,
sleeping dogs protect the way

And furthermore, I know I’ll suffer
from all the losses back on earth

And surely Kain had known it better
if he had heard my story end

Careful, but still avoiding
I feel your noble skin

These creatures you call human
have treated me like a schismatic
Please feed me with some truth
I hunger for your bitter words

Injured, but still standing

I know whose deed it is

^back to top

The curse

Plastic needles in my skin
Don’t ask me what they’re for
no clue except for pain and shock
You tied me to the bed to mock

My eyelids kept wide open
so I can see all that you do
All this liquid in my eyes
Come inside my world, friend, if you dare… the curse

It’s cold, I shiver while I sweat
room without a glimpse of sunlight
my head is shaved, my body bruised
Can’t feel my fingers, everything is numb… the curse

Your reality is twisted
It seems you just don’t notice
that all you do to me
can never touch me mentally,

but you can do all this to me
It’s not like it would matter
Much worse than, so much worse than that
I can’t get you out of my head

Where is that strong human will now?
guess there are things you can’t escape from…
I don’t know, but something isn’t right here…
I guess what you expect from me is fear… the curse

I stare… but there is nothing I can see
God knows, with only one hand I could…
your giggles reach me from next door
I wonder what is this all for?… the curse

^back to top

O’Brother sleep

These faces, noone embraces,
trade your intelligence for a smile

He who harasses – innocent masses –
forgives, to save your soul – in time

Desperate believers, emotion dealers
have never learned to cry liquid pearls

And silently these tribes of traitors
have captured everyone, including you

Have you commanded painfully?
Have you avoided endlessly?
Have you not seen these tired faces?
Have only left your gruesome traces!

These are my words to make an empire fall
and to raise a new, a better one

^back to top

Chrysalis

Read my lips and speak out loud
My fingertips are more than proud
To touch your skin, to feel your face

I’m drowning in your sweet embrace

Emptyness and incompleteness
Endlessness and in-defeat-less
has never been this little
No longer I could spare a thought

You said I’m welcome any time
Be sure I know all flaws are mine
Your promises are never lasting

for longer than it takes to say them.

Ease my pain and say again…
Tell me that you think the same

^back to top

Traumtänzer

Die Zeit steht still in diesem Raum
Doch merken’s andere Menchen kaum

Es steht die Luft hier in der Schwebe
Als ob der Wind-h-auch nicht mehr lebe
Die Stille schmerzt in meinen Ohren
Ich wünscht ich hätt Dich nicht verloren.

Während Träume sich erinnern
an die Zeit vor unserer Zeit
Vergißt Du all Sorge
Was Dir ein wenig Kraft verleiht

Du enthälst Dich vieler Dinge
erklärst Dich klug als Philosoph
Du entehrst so viele Dinge
Bist Dir hörig wie ein Zof!

Wirst Du mich nie verstehen?
Wirst Du denn nie verstehen?
Hast Du noch nie gesehen…
wie meine Augen glitzern?

Keiner mag Dir mehr vertrauen
Schenkt kein Wort Dir edler Gunst
Siehst Deinen Schatten schon verschwinden
Dort am Horizon im Dunst

…denn es ist Zeit, für eine neue Melodie,
für eine neue Phantasie, für eine neue Harmonie

Ich stehe aug und geh nun fort

an einen fremden, fernen Ort
Gesichter reden auf mich ein
So werd ich nie zu Hause sein.

Wirst Du mich nie verstehen?
Wirst Du denn nie verstehen?
Hast Du noch nie gesehen…
wie meine Augen glitzern?

^back to top

Rebellion

Ich möchte die Stille mein Eigen nennen.
Die Zeit rast, als hätte sie es eilig zu vergehen.
Raub den Menschen Ihre Illusion, so zerstörst du auch Ihr Streben

Es fehlen so viele Worte in einem Buch, so viele Töne in einem Stück Musik
Das Einzige woran ich wirklich zu glauben vermag ist die Wut.
Die größte Stärke des Menschen ist demnach auch seine Schwäche…

Ich möchte die Stille mein Eigen nennen. Mein Besitz.

Verstehst Du mich nicht?
Hörst Du mich nicht?

Avec des larmes dans la voix
Je t’écoute
Tu déformes la résignation
Je te demande cent fois
Comment était-ce possible?

La rébellion du silence
Fragile image
J’ai écrit ton nom.

^back to top

Bastard

Regret… that’s all it is!
But what for?

What is the purpose…
And yet you always look back.
You go to all these familiar places.
You see familiar faces.

Forgive and forget.

My tears dry in this desert
My laughter dies within your smile
I shall rest here for a while

For I have lost all that I loved.

^back to top

Amok

I put so much faith into you
I trusted everybody except myself

Tales of your behaviour
Like paper in a book

You try to be my saviour
How come you can not see the truth?

I am-ok, if I am-ok, you see…

Don’t be such a stranger –
I am-ok, but you’re in danger!
I walked for years to get this far
I have to tell you once again…

You say my dreams have all turned grey
How ignorant of you to say!
You claim that you can feel my pain
Insane of you to stay!

^back to top

She

She has the silence deep in her breasts embraced

She wears a perfume of a truly vicious taste.
She has the wisdom in her empathic eyes.
She knows the truth to all unspoken lies.

She says she’d sell her angel for a dream
She says that she is not who she might seem
She says that she has lost her self-esteem
She says that she will not give up her dream

She offers traitors her lap to feel like home.

She masters violence as if she fears noone.
She makes your anger turn into quiet tears.
She makes you laugh about intimate fears.

She hears the voices that tell me what to do.
She looks into our eyes, but only smiles at you.
She knows the warmth she feels is not for long.
She stopped to speak that’s why I end this song.

It’s kind of funny, you know…

’cause I’m not really here for your psycho games
Little demons make your eyes turn silver, you freak!
Your lips are turning blue
No, this is really not my kind of stimulation
No, this is not a proper treatment
Life? You can have it if you want!
It doesn’t mean anything to me, anyway, you freak!

^back to top

Verdict

Observe the strategies of war
I know you needed so much more
This is mental, so sentimental
Any way is my way
Anything I cared for you destroyed,
any promise null and void

Can’t you take my pain away. Tell me, can you?
Can’t we close our eyes forever. Help me, can you?

And now, you wonder why I’m asking you to go.

I’d give up anything to make your dreams come true
and if I’d pray I’d pray for you.
I’d leave your world to find a new one,
but don’t you dare misunderstand!

How can this be a sacrifice,
if you did not lose anything?
I know it isn’t fair,
but have we ever asked for fairness?

Save yourself from needless harm,
An overdose for now?
How can I talk about completeness,
if I consist of many pieces?

How can these walls come closer,
if there are really none?

^back to top

Play God!

What is this penetration?
If not some pre-salvation?
What is a mental attitude?

Why is my fever not in mood?

It’s me combining numbers
It’s me just playing God
It’s me who’s making rules here
I cannot come undone

Why don’t you compensate
my pain and all my hate
Have you really tried to compromise?

Have you never realized…

Accompanied by faces
that stare at you at night
I’m travelling into your sleep
until you wake up pale from fright

And after all you’ve been through
I sleep safe like a child
A coward in deceit

It’s garbage what you feed them… so

Consider penetration
as instant motivation
Regarding what you said to me
I think that you should never be forgiven

Don’t persecute me for what I’ve done
perplex, poisoned, predictable
Permissable disaster, patriotic smiles

predominant aggression
if you have (the) guts, resist my trace

^back to top

She and her darkness

My heart weighs minimum a ton
An army’s feet pounding on my head
Maybe I’ll wake up one day to notice

that all my life was just a dream…

And maybe I’ll be better of without you
You left me here with all my thoughts
I’d write a zillion words or walk a million miles
I’d sleep on broken glass just not to lose your smiles

I travel for you around the world
Collecting moments, o how absurd
To bring you beauty, to bring you joy

I wish I’d be a little boy

Where is that silence you promised me?
Why is that distance so close to me?
Why is your violence still hurting me?
Why are your eyes avoiding me?

Let me say thank you for all that you have given me.
Thank you for everything you’ve done.
Forgive me for saying one last thing:

I miss you and I hope you hear this song!

I travel for you around the world
Collecting moments, o how absurd
To bring you beauty, to bring you joy
I wish I’d be a little boy

I’m dying for you, can’t you see?
I’m lying for you to be free!
I hunger for you, ’cause I can’t eat!

I’d vanish for you in defeat!

^back to top

Diary Of Dreams – End of Flowers

End of Flowers

01. End Of Flowers
02. Victimized
03. A Fool Too Blame
04. Scars Of Greed
05. Oblivion
06. Cold Deceit
07. Retaliation
08. Willow
09. Deviation
10. Eyesolation
11. Tears Of Laughter

End Of Flowers

Monuments of grace
Discharge my credits
The future is my past
Take a risk – survive

Fortunate belief
Enter – communicate

Contrasts – black and white
Disgusting beauty

Roses dying
Just in secrecy
Children crying
Their flowers bloom
Innocence rejected
Virginal deceit

Secret
Hidden
You dare to speak

Learn to fake
Learn to feel
Learn to heal

^back to top

Victimized

And have you seen
Through the curtain of my life ?
Get down to the rescue –
For my shelter – mental incest

Archaic disciples
Offer their support

But who to fuck am I to dare to accept ?

So take your victimized lies
Take your generous disguise
Sceptic privilege of mine
To the conquest of an angel
To the defeat of a beast
Glued to senses
Attached to all I need

And continuous monologues of insanity
Blood in floods
Rushing – longing
Urging to believe

Give me strength
Give me idols
Give my dreams a rest
Reality accepted, …..or not…..?

^back to top

A Fool Too Blame

Autumn leaves are falling
A kingdom left behind
Aimless steps in silence
My crutches fall

I crawl along this path

A stare – possessed
I cannot remain conscious
I sink to the ground

Have you crowned me
To kill a king ?
Or did you just need
A fool to blame ?

Why have you disguised me ?

I urge to bare

Your wisdom slaved
To my debility
You abused my senses
In case of need

You made me depend
On stranger’s hands
A kingdom falls

A king, a fool to blame

And how could you dare betray me –
To astray – in paradise

^back to top

Scars Of Greed

(Crowned with thorns)

O`angels come to guide me in my sacred land
Thine holy glance enlights my chamber
Stranger worlds in fractal thoughts

A gentle thrill
I’m crowned with thorns
Who will remember this ?

Quiet doms of whispering circling in my head
Collapsing mental boundries

Draconic lips of mine

And angels still corrupting with a silent word of wisdom
O`angels find their sacred land
In my debility they bloom

Kill my flesh
Kill my skin

Cure my sore

Cure my belief

A wince, just to regret
To wear a willow
A wince, just to regret self – sacrifice
To wear the willow- lost within

And grieve for what I’ve lost – a mournful eye
My thirst for life embodies prayers at night
I sentence myself – a wilful execution

Disclaiming innocence indeed

O`angel find their sacred land in mine
What they have never dared to be

O`angel find their sacred land in mine
Where they can be what they greed

O`angel find their sacred land in mine
For they can still make me believe

O`angel find their sacred land in mine
For they have crowned me ……

……Crowned with thorns

^back to top

Oblivion

Immortal hatred longing

For what I’ve done to you
A shattered dream of greed
Confess of a faded bloom

Reminded day by day
The scars just cannot heal
Still unforgiven guilt
Am I a child within your hands ?

Tear my heart out, let me fall

Keep my faith enclosed in walls
Like a child within your hands
Close my eyes and let me fall

Into oblivion I urge
For you I dare to feel regret
A sacrifice I cannot fear
How can I cure what you protect ?

Immortal hatred longing

For what I’ve done for you
A shattered dream of need
Moments without truth

A mournful sacrifice
The scars will never heal

^back to top

Cold Deceit

Crucified in my mortal chamber
Begging eyes deceive my strength
Stumbling feet into horizons
Tear – stained cheeks taint my soul

In cold deceit

In captive secrecy still waiting
For the truth that I can’t find

A stranger’s words in cryptic silence
My paradise in cold deceit

While my sympathy is dying
I loose belief of who I am
Victims fatefully united
Imploring now in seclusion

Have you seen through my disguise ?
In cold deceit

Have you felt my shattered eyes ?
In cold deceit

^back to top

Retaliation

Enemies adorned by childish innocence
Dictators rule
Granted words you offer

I urge to spread wings of decay

Bridges fall to split the nation
Walls enrise for better days to please
Draining ditch – water from my eyes
Retaliate

A veil of mystery I feel
Blindfold in obscurity
In the shade of a tree

I cannot remain here

My sweetest passion
My sweet, sweet revenge
My sweetest passion
My sweet retaliation

Hammering on my fragile ideals
In a cage of manic patience
Drawn into a growing chaos

My intentions seem to fall

My state of mind an inferno
This mind, which cannot comprehend
A torment to my conscience
My objectives lost in frozen shades

Engraved
The scars of time
Yet never healed

But still, the spark of hope does never rest

My sweetest passion
My sweet, sweet revenge
My sweetest passion
My sweet retaliation

^back to top

Willow

Just give me nails
To be my burden

Crucified emotions struggle to survive
And the truth, she has not heard for long

Cold and bare, but sacred ?
Who has the guts to spread such lies

A picture of a willow – with a widow in black

A child ton bear – in blooming beauty

For she gave birth to dust

Roses covered by a layer of snow
Freezing wind surrounding,
What you call holy feet
Just a child without a wooden cross

Afflicted hands towards heaven

How could you dare deny ?

How can you blame a widow
For detesting who you are ?

Bare of sore – touch naked boundaries
And empty hands – a widow’s life

^back to top

Deviation

And the place was burning
Where once my cradle stood
Memories still yearning
For what my childhood took

In peaceful shelter I may rest
Just instincts of salvation
O`deviate from the within
But hate I may not feel

A nations decay within my eyes
Imploring still in vague seclusion
A tear from a child’s eye- obeying still
But fate just ties together

What’s my flesh ?
And what my skin ?
What my privilege ?
And what a sin ?

Have I come to stay
What I can never be ?
Have I come to beg
For a new identity ?
….to blame…

O` I have tried to fly
But I did not have wings
I have tried to speak

But I did not know how

Like a new-born child
I have tried to trust
Reaching out
But my cradle burning

A nations decay within my eyes
Imploring still in vague seclusion
A tear from a child’s eye- obeying still

But fate just ties together

Just memories today
Yes, I exist, but do I also live ?
I must deviate from the within
But hate I may not feel

^back to top

Eyesolation

Raindrops fall to cleanse my soul
The song of whales tear me apart
My eyes still stray along this shore
A seagulls` plaint adoring mine

My tongue too weak to speak a word
O` was I born to be misunderstood
Fingers touch, but do not feel
O` tired seem my restless eyes

So tired is my smile
In my endless depth of guilt
A cripple of my fear
And the needle serves me well

Memories now wash ashore
I feel remains of sympathy
Imagine the ability
To gather roses in winter….

Somebody
Something
Welcomed me
On the other side

Dank and gentle
Moist and soft
Almost like lone

The needle serves me well

But whom have I to blame ?
Just the cripple of my fear
Just call my disguise
The needle serves me well

The needle serves me well
But whom have I to blame ?
So tired is my smile

Was I born to astray
In my endless depth of guilt ?
Just a cripple of my fear

Just call my disguise
Just almost like love
And the needle serves me well….

^back to top

Tears Of Laughter

I would be crying tears of laughter
If I could see me smile again

I still reach for the stars, but all I touch is my horizon
I still believe my eyes, but all I see is my blindness
I still reach for the stars, but all I touch is my horizon
I still believe my ears, but all I hear is lasting silence

Like a disciple of a witness
I judge upon my sacred eye
Still found the origin
In what’s left of me inside

Ca I call this my burden
Or is this just my dream to fly ?

Weaker, weaker every day

I forgot my urge to fly away

And is my life as bare as it is ?
Cold and lonely enough ?
Have you achieved what you were longing for ?
Sad enough this cannot be undone

I drop my eyes and shiver as I see
The reflection in the mirror of me

Have you given up, my friend ?
Forgiveness be mine

^back to top

Diary Of Dreams – Cholymelan

Cholymelan

01. Ein Wiegenlied
02. At The Border Of My Nation
03. Shattered Disguise
04. War On A Meadow
05. Holier Than Thou Approach
06. False Affection, False Creation
07. And Silence Still Remains
08. Phantasmogoria
09. To Conquer The Angel’s Laugh
10. Cholymelan

Ein Wiegenlied

A childish dream
Sacrifice – surrender
Surrender shame
Shame
Sins and sinners
Shame
My sins and sinners

^back to top

At The Border Of My Nation

The sky ranges the past
Enclosed in ancient walls
Captured in memories
A kingdom to survive
Immortal silence gathers illusions inside
I see the desert sand
Whirled up by the feet of war

A mournful eye in isolation
Blinded by a silent spell
Slaved to my debility

My future in those hands
That I can’t move
Like a victim
On his knees
The guidance still mine?

I take the blame

To find salvatation
And I await
The worst to come
The guidance still mine?

Tomorrow seems remote – so distant
My expectations evapurate

Leaving nothing to breathe
Another day to survive in silence

^back to top

Shattered Disguise

To the sound of your laughter
To the sound of your cries
Decays within silence

In the depth of your eyes

Numb expectations in my shattering voice
Face to face with existence
Ashes of hope in my shivering hands
Melting illusions like a bridge to my dreams

As I fall
Into the depth of your eyes
As I fall

Into your shattered disguise

Silhouettes slowly fading
As darkness dissolves
I detest what I sense
with my untouchable eyes

^back to top

War On A Meadow

Ancient sights to slave his longings
Lost and captive between two worlds
Have you seen this place before?
Have you seen my fields of joy?

But within his eyes the beauty fading
Sacrificed my life of lies
Torn apart to fade in cries

Hiding in the conflict of confusion
To quiver gently, torn apart inside
But facing sights that my lies can’t hide

Defaced by war to ruin my shelter
But still my memories cannot dissolve
But still I’m drowning deep inside
And all my hoping seems in vain

Have you seen this place before?

Have you seen my fields of joy?
Have you seen me sink into despair?

^back to top

Holier Than Thou Approach

Have you felt the forgiveness
He has spread across the land?
Have you felt the dignity

In each of the people’s heads?
But have you also seen the pain
Or did he give you eyes in vain?
Diseases, wars and shattered pride
And a nation dressed in black

I shiver as I read your words
They’re all depraved as I can see
Though you’ve got more children

Or better servants than you can use
You keep us blind, you keep us weak
You don’t allow to introspect

I say: You’re more depraved than thou appear
Holier than thou approach?

I shiver as I read your words
You don’t allow to introspect
Was it you to spread the blood

That once has flown in Garden Eden?
Though your servants still believe the words
That you’re supposed to have said

I say: You’re holier than thou appear
Holier than thou approach?

^back to top

False Affection, False Creation

Viscious words and false belief
Chains around my wrists
A sad sensation
The craving for life is gone
Intoxicate me in the trot of life
A yelling laugh decays my dream
A laugh to fear my deed

A false affection, a false creation

Suspicious eyes enslaved within
Imprisoned – shame and guilt
But still a child
Confessing all my sins
Elaborated, but still out of reach
My hands still shiver
My eyes don’t move
A deed you can’t neglect

A false affection, a false creation

^back to top

And Silence Still Remains

Eyes in silence
Eyes in the dark
A life in patience
To survive and surrender

Whatever I feel
Whatever I see is just
A sign of hope
A reflection of my memories
Words covered with dust
In a book to my left
An urge to read
No permission
Helpless eyes

Voices fading
I regret
I regret
I tilt my head
I close my eyes
Voice – louder
Temptation rising
I shiver
I’m a stranger in my own skin

I’ll survive
But for how long?
And silence still remains

Whatever my belief and identity will offer
I can never purify my thoughts

And still
I linger in temptation
Still not daring to reach out

The book
My dreams
Written out in words that I can’t read
My fingers write
What my mind is not capable to think of
And silence still remains
I’m a stranger in my own skin
But I’ll survive
My fingers write

What my mind is not capable to think of
But I’ll survive

But for how long…?

^back to top

Phantasmogoria

(Das Blendwerk)

And I meander in mortal lanes of festering
But still my childish instincts bloom
Screaming out my soul to the rhythm of the pendulum
Droplets of despair – apparition distorted

My lifeless pulse still rushing on
Pumping to the pendulum

Time’s elapsing while I’m waiting
Waiting in anticipation

And I still try to hold on
To what is fading from my eyes

My lifeless pulse still rushing on
Pumping to the pendulum

^back to top

To Conquer The Angel’s Laugh

To conquer the angel’s laugh

An urge implied
A captious offer in your hands
My hymne of praise denied
Disguising, fading scarlet of your belief
Drowning gently in commands
It’s your defeat

Mephisto, my fallen angel
Corrupted patience in your eyes

Your urge to rise denied
Your justice shivering in faded trust
Mankind like puppets in your hands
It’s our defeat

Mephisto, o Mephisto
Our shattered pride inhaled by you
Rejecting innocence
Betrayed by your own kind – a selfish deed

I’m calling you to conquer me
Rescue me

To conquer the angel’s laugh
Inside my head
An urge to feel temptation rise
A deed of pure illusions
To feel just silence move
And I’ll regret…

^back to top

Cholymelan

Angefangen zu traumen…

Erwacht und erkannt
Die Traume verronnen

Mit zitternder Hand

Auch das letzte Blatt gewendet

Das Buch nun verstaubt
In der verlorenen Zeit

^back to top

Diary Of Dreams – Bird Without Wings

Bird Without Wings

01. Stimulation
02. Bird Without Wings II
03. Dissolution
04. June
05. Aphelion
06. But The Wind Was Stronger
07. A Sinners Instincts
08. Ex-ile
09. Legends
10. Flood Of Tears

Stimulation

Others cry for help
Just like it would change anything
v Lunatics find no conclusion
Bodies simply gliding
Figures draw wildest illusions
Drag me in their draft

My back so strong like thousand reptiles
My fingers reach for miles

Perversion finds its roots within our hearts
Some-body dares to love

Fingertips touch so many bodies
Motionless accepted
Lips regret so many kisses
Whispered words just as well

Mistaken seem my careful moves
Misunderstood my choice of words

Psycho-logically seen
I prefer this kind of stimulation

^back to top

Bird Without Wings II

This bird so crippled – little bird
Just wants to learn to fly – Longing for the sky
Tell me fellow – sufferer – Tear apart my fate

Who broke them and why – Just another try
Tar-stained feathers – broken wings
Preachers rise your hands – Like shattered pride
Now life can be damn boring – Hunted, wanted
With your eyes raised to the sky-dancing-wild

Sophistication – Heaven , sky
Sophistication – Tell me why ?
Sophistication – Heaven, sky

Sophistication – No wings to fly

Circles, vicious circles – Faith and fate
As the wind denies my wish – Belief and doubts
How can you leave me here ? – Struggling helpless
I’m missing what’s still there – Between the clouds

Broken wings – Heaven , sky
With remains of reflexes – Attempt, temptations
Trying to lift me up – Helpless cries

Far beyond the clouds – And falling nations

^back to top

Dissolution

What can I say ?
What can I do ?
Why can I face this world ?
In which I must endure

Intimate compulsion
“Legitimate” , you say
But nothing ever prospers
If not the thought is noble

I’m not alone
But still lonely
What else eludes my eyes
Distracted fingers

Regarding others
However impressive words might be
Do they distract me ?
Consider me demented ?!

Disposess my secrets
In a concept hidden well
See my silhouettes in absence
Alive as body swell

In dissolution
Dissolution

Absorbing life from others
Like sucking from a straw
Abstracted methods fear the truth
Dissolving what may last

Melting life in naked hands

Eyes now open
Rebellious hearts delivered
As a gift of a good friend

In dissolution
Dissolution

^back to top

June

Now I’m living life without you
And I’m waiting to hear you grasp for air
June lies hidden in those ruins of your eyes
Have you seen me stumble in this demented world ?

June you’ve lost your colour
Could one stray under your wings

Liberty, a word I read once in a book

Frozen roses, as a gift to your content

I figured I could risk this stupid absolution
O` disillusioned, I’m face to face with silence
Your quivering breath, too weak to survive
What a shame, we never spoke a word

Liberty, a word I read once in a book
Frozen roses, as a gift to your content
Icicle-rain pounding on my head

Images demand to take a smile for granted

Tomorrow is always the first day of
the end of your life

^back to top

Aphelion

My daddy ask for secrets
My mother doesn’t care

To hide the hidden
Deep inside

And while I sleep
Shivering faces
In candle-light
Lose their names

Affected sympathy
Victim or witness

While fathers
Betray themselves

I hear your selfish words
Whispers of support
I feel your touch
Shivering too much

O` Aphelion
See my fear is gone

I tasted grapes of wrath

Just funny how the sparrows die
While eagles fly
So way up, so high

My daddy asks for secrets
My mother doesn’t care
But who cares to see
Who I one day may be

And I still belong
Where my cradle once has been
I still belong
Where I was born with grapes of wrath

O` Aphelion
See my fear is gone
I tasted grapes of wrath
See my fear is gone

See the damage done on me

^back to top

But The Wind Was Stronger

Wind o` carry me away
Guide my angels -unlink their chains
Words find echoes in my past
My delusion now unmasked

I dare to touch this bodies surface
Temptation blinding my resistance
I could linger so much longer
But the wind was stronger

Yes I know my eyes are sinning
Longing for what is not mine
Defend her purity with mercy
Thread my guts, cut off my tongue

Merge my conflict with the wind
Mesmerise my childish instincts
Then I will not suffer any longer
But still the wind was stronger

My puppets, angels, dolls and she
Starring, whispering at me
Ready to drop – in chains paralysed
On naked skin I feel their glares

Embarrassed of what they might see
I cannot speak, I cannot think
Scared to death I move no longer
Yes, I guess the wind was stronger

^back to top

A Sinners Instincts

I called you sinner’s

I was wrong

Inaccurate intention
Should have said you’re sorry
Might have reduced the conflict
But tough, admit it’s said

God’s creation
To put your blame on
God’s creation

To turn away from

Appreciate those hands you’re given
Before you really need to beg for them
Try to understand my incantation
Out of breath, your fingers shiver

Apocalyptically divided
Mentally disturbed they call me
Respect instead of affection

Disclaim that I am one of you

Can I fall down from the stars
Can I rise up from hell

Absurd – Your protest avoids the consequences
How can you cheat yourself ?
Ridiculous – to see you smile
Knowing you’d prefer to cry !

^back to top

Ex-ile

Now sit – sucker – and beg for mercy
I saved your life a million times
Why serve if you can rule yourself ?
So sceptical of my existence
My mutation-gently gliding – switched to normal
So desperate, so sincere like a child

O` I can’t see my face in any mirrors
Fanatically I’m moving on…into

Ex-ile exploited – Humiliation costs

Deceitful
Disgustful
But words can never change the facts

Distrustful

Disrespectful
But fanatics never lose their trace

Your enemies surround your kingdom
Your disciples in defeat
Come home, we’ll welcome you with laughter
And your longing turns concrete

Reject the courts decision
Sweat pearls gliding, as the judge regains the word

Put blame on your breast until it bursts apart
or choose to vegetate … into

Ex-ile exploited – Humiliation costs

^back to top

Legends

Call viper’s son
Fear the suns of my horizons

Sequential movements in reverse
Paradise denies its treasure

A higher dose regains the silence
“Ambiguous”, the wiseman said
Virgin-white my pale disguise
The traitor is still alive

Legends rise
And Legends falls

Little lies
As we know all

Eyes – a stare and I don’t care
Milk glass distorts my view
Deliver me to my reality
You cannot kill, what cannot die

Avoid the touch my cold body
Avoid to fall into my eyes

Creatures shiver and preachers lie
My legend’s not a lullaby

So unfair, as this life is

^back to top

Flood Of Tears

Mother see, that all my life
I planted flowers to survive

And as they faded I stopped to speak
I painted flowers
and nobody knows why…..

No awakening, no lullaby
I only felt the need to try
To have the guts or the stupidity
To grab for stars, that I can’t reach at all

Father see, that I have tried

To find that angel deep inside
That you once promised I would meet
And once again I ended in defeat

Even here I could feel your eyes
Heard your whispers and felt your eyes
Brother said “Come back to life”
I asked some friends
and nobody knew why …..

Nobody had ever seen
my flood of tears
I can’t believe you found me here

It took some time to find these words
I wrote them down in hope that they might help
Watch me walk barefoot on glass
Insecure as only a newborn child can be

Others came to laugh at me
They pointed fingers as I could see
Believe me saying it’s not the skin
It’s the stranger living deep inside

Mother see, that all my life
I painted flowers to survive
And as they faded I stopped to paint
I fell asleep

and nobody knows why…..

Father see, that I have tried
To build a world with only me inside
Millions of flowers surround my bed
Now I still grab for stars and I can reach them all

^back to top

Diary Of Dreams – Panik Manifesto

Panik Manifesto

01. Painkiller
02. Panik?
03. Soul Stripper
04. Sin Skinner
05. Drama
06. The Scream
07. Monsters and Demons

Painkiller

Tell me who is next?
And who was the last one?
No word to disturb this endless beauty,
a single thought will prove me wrong!

A single thought will prove me wrong
as if it was my last one!
Come see, without the color
there`s nothing left to love.

Say good-bye to all your memories
Don`t ask me why!
I count my yesterdays.
Soul surgery, electric dream treatment,
eyes turned blind that once could see…

Es gibt kein zweites wiedersehen
im schlaf, mein bruder
Wirst du mich schon verstehen
bevor ein neuer tag vergeht, nur du…
Fangst du mir einen traum.

So please be quiet in this room,
this is a place of silence.

^back to top

Panik?

Radical impulse
invading present thinking.

Dead end dreams
sore throat from all these lies.

Liberty, dignity
one nasty ego.

We thought we had a choice
panik manifesto.

Angel, how much longer…
Angel, how much further…
…until your sweet cocoon?

I scribble on the ceiling,
on the walls and on the floor.

I shiver in the corner,
cause I forgot to lock the door.

Deleted memories of false identities,
unfortunately I
did never say good-bye.

^back to top

Soul Stripper

(Never go, never let me go)
(Soul stripper)

A walk, no destination
Backwards, never forwards
You sound like you,
but look like someone else

What is this world you come from?
Who taught you how to be that way?
Are you not scared to hurt yourself?
Go count the stars with someone else!

A schizophrenic attitude,
determined admiration,
explicit language overkill
with mimic deformation.
In constant search for your next thrill…
Sacrilegious beast of mind,
aggravated.
Brain alert!
Affinity.
Invasion!

Apocalyptic overdose
if you can`t sense the danger!
One way ticket passenger
Your lies will bring you nowhere.

Drastic methods to assure
that you have true intentions.
Nobody dares to ask you why…
They keep you calm on drugs.

^back to top

Sin Skinner

Your secret world is far away,
you don`t listen to what I say.
Give me permission to enter.
I`d like to understand,
let me hold your hand.

Let me be your sin skinner…

My liberty in isolation,
my fingertips in consolation.
A sad condition, my intuition.
Let me be your friend,
I`m here to heal the sand.

Keep my integrity intact,
I want to base my life on facts.
Whatever comes, I never know,
but life will ultimately show.

Still very silent
I even hear your breath.
What have I come for?
I know I wanted more…
Have you not understood?
It is your life they took,
And all you do is cry,
Don`t tell the world good-bye!

^back to top

Drama

You come from far away
looking for a place to stay.
No matter where you go
they say that you can`t stay.

You can`t decide what`s wrong or right,
frustration overcomes the pride.
You only want some sleep,
you only want to spend the night.

It is tragic to hope for magic,
it is tragic, so dramatic.
Yes, it is tragic to hope for magic,
it is tragic, so dramatic.

A stranded stranger masqueraded
noble gestures complimenting.

My sentiment, temptation`s hand,
I know you think you`re clever
since you tell me vivid lies
that I believe and then repeat to feel alright.

It seems like nothing mattered
to you or anyone
until one day it happened…
The silence has begun!

^back to top

The Scream

What is?
What was?
Where is that vivid look?
We came, we saw what all these visions took!
They cry in fear hoping for mercy
and how you scream, you beg for silence.

Whatever happens please foresee,
only trust your enemy.
Whatever happens please foresee,
only trust your memory.

Confront me with this sort of madness,
unkind indeed to be this helpless.
I know, I want my little world back,
this place of light where life is intact.

No heart – no pain!
I think I am insane…
So still – my shell!
One step closer to hell!
My rage, my hate have a rendez-vous with fate.
My fear stays here, you needles come too late.

^back to top

Monsters and Demons

I know that I don`t know
what you think that I should.
I`m writing my bible
so you know what I could.
Could you be the one
to abandon my spirits?
Get rid of my blindness
I need to see clearly…

I need to see clearly
for I love you dearly.
My little inferno
and all these illusions
from my total light.

To my infinite fright
is insanity my friend?
First nail in my hand…

Monsters and demons
regretful intrigues and
I`m counting the days
as my self-conscience stays…
In this room full of nothing
the fool that I`m painting
while you are the warmth
and the violence I long for…

Rebellious as I am
I sing what I can`t feel,
I feel like I`m crying
still always denying
and constantly craving
for heavenly places
that I couldn`t find
in your ignorant faces…

Monsters and demons…

^back to top

Work in progress... not home!
Trying to get all/most of the new code working before I start on the eyecandy.